No. 121: You refer to friends in their early 20s as "the kids."
No. 48: Anything past midnight, er 10 p.m. is "way past your bedtime."
No. 437: It's 2:30 a.m. and you're on the crapper because of those delicious hot wings you ate 7 hours ago. (Courtesy of Scott)
No. 19: You now plan your weekend around mowing the lawn and consider weed-whacking your anger management strategy.
No. 284: Comparing aches and pains is your version of war stories and battle scars.
No. 23: The walk of shame now consists of a shuffling trip to the medicine cabinet. In your flannel PJs and worn-out slippers, not your black heels and cute jeans.
We are really having an 'old moment.'
Now where is my cane???